We hate getting phone calls from telemarkers. No word of a lie, we’ve been getting calls from air duct companies at least 4 times a week. The Husband is so fed up. So the other day, he decided to play games with the guy on the other end of the phone. He kept telling him to hold while he went to check our records. You know, the guy actually waited on the line for, like, 4 minutes.
The funniest was when Chris and I were joking about what to say to these companies, “Oh I’m so glad you called. How do you clean the ducts (translation: ducks)? Is it messy? What happens to the feathers? We don’t have any ducks, but we’ve got some geese”. HILARIOUS!
So for today’s Friday Favourites, I present you with some funny lines on how to get rid of telemarkers.
- After the Telemarketer gives his or her spiel, ask him or her to marry you. When they get all flustered, tell them that you can’t just give your credit card number to a complete stranger.
- Answer the phone. As soon as you realize it is a Telemarketer, set the receiver down, scream, “OH MY GOD!” and then hang up.
- Tell the Telemarketer you are on “home incarceration” and ask if they could bring you some beer.
- Tell the Telemarketer, “Okay, I’ll listen to you. But I should probably tell you, I’m not wearing any clothes.”
- Tell them to talk very slowly, because you want to write every word down.
- If they start out with, “How are you today?” say, “I’m so glad you asked, because no one these days seems to care, and I have all these problems. My arthritis is acting up, my eyelashes are sore, my dog just died . . . “
Happy Weekend! See you Monday.